I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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