According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
