My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize