he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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