At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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