Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
