I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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