in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize