I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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