i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
