R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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