which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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