If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
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woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
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Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal