Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
