i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
