I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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