They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize