I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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