i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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