I want to stick my p in your. b.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize
