whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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