It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
