There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
