I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
