Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
