And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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