watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize