I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
