ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
So vagazzling was a success
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize