guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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