The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
When are your genitals available?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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