hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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