Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
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