Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize