I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
