New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
