my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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