i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
