just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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