birth control should be required to get into college
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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