there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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