I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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