You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize