I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
