i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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