i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
