no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Randomize
