He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
