I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
