I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Randomize