I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
