I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
His nipple licking is glorious
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