Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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